Opinions Are Like, Well You Know How It Goes

While getting my wife's Toyota inspected in Lake Jackson the other day I noticed a sign posted above the cash register that had the following words inscribed on it: "You have every right to your opinion . . . just as long as it agrees with mine!" George Moses operates the vehicle repair and inspection place that I was doing business with on this particular day. I made a little comment about his sign, stating that I couldn't agree with its sentiments more. George said he gets lots of comments about that little sign. And before I could write my check to pay him for the Toyota inspection and make my way out the door, ol' George and I disagreed on at least two opinions before I could depart. I find it funny how that is, the way people can get their noses all out of joint when somebody disagrees with their take on any of a wide variety of topics. Politics. That's a subject that human beings, especially in America, can find so easy to disagree on. The Democrats blame everything that is wrong with our country on the Republicans, implying that George W. is the sole cause of our country being in the rotten condition it is these days. And the Republicans are painting a very clear picture of doom and gloom in our forecast based on the road to ruin our new president is allegedly leading us down. With devout members of the two major political parties in America there is no middle ground. One party, the one that recently vacated the White House, sees everything at one end of the spectrum while the other party, the one currently inhabiting the White House, is so far away from the other side's view of things that it boggles the mind to think Republicans and Democrats are even talking about the same subjects. Race relations. There's another topic that can quickly lead to blows being thrown, if not a discussion on differing opinions rapidly eroding to name calling and invectives spewing from the mouths of what had only moments earlier been supposed level-headed, educated, thoughtful individuals. I have witnessed more than my share of these disputes in my half-century of listening to the many different viewpoints on how the various races should intermingle and co-exist, or not. And religion. Don't even go there, brother, unless you are really prepared to roll up the old sleeves and get down in the dirt in order to stand your ground when the discussion rolls around to the many different opinions on religions and their various beliefs about who will and will not make it through the pearly gates when that time comes. "You gotta serve somebody," Bob Dylan wails in his great song from his 1979 album "Slow Train Coming" that goes on to say, "It might be the devil or it might be the Lord, but you gotta serve somebody!" I have very strong opinions on all of these controversial topics, as well as others like abortion, homosexuality, narrowing or expanding the gap between the various economic groups in our country, raising taxes, lowering taxes, and so on, and so on . . . Hypocrisy would be the word of the day, though, if I were to use this blog pulpit to bore the few readers I have with my droning on and on about what I think about this, and what my opinions are on that, and how such and such makes me so damned mad . . . In that half-century I have been around there still remains one unanswerable question that continues to befuddle me. Who is more hard-headed and stubborn? A Gupton or a Giesler? That is the combination of DNA that I was created from. I grew up around many highly opinionated people who I was proud to call my family. Both of my parents, my Gupton father and Giesler mother, loved a good argument. But they were both mere amateurs in the strong opinion game when my grandmother, Pauline Giesler, was also playing. Among my fondest childhood memories are sitting back and listening to Grandma state her case on a variety of subjects when I was a kid. This feisty little German woman would punctuate her statements with a pounding fist on the table and a heightened sense of righteousness when her voice would rise several octaves until she felt sure her argument had been stated to the point where there could be no possible challenge to its accuracy. Man, I loved listening to Grandma spit out her vituperation in a manner that only she could. Even when she was wrong! Today I sit back many times and absorb all of the talk going on around me. But it's just not the same. Perhaps in your world arguments still reach boiling points with a frequency that could match the many I remember from my youthful days, but not in my own world. I am part of a family today where most of us keep our strong opinions to ourselves. And when we do step out of character and make a strong statement pertaining to a particular topic, rarely do the other members of my family debate the issue beyond a mild, "Well, I respect your opinion but I beg to differ." For some reason that response just doesn't have the same zing to it as "F&%# you and the horse you rode in on!" My spouse and children and I disagree on a wide range of topics. Politics? You betcha. Religion? Who you kiddin'? My son Bret loves a good argument. But I've noticed Bret prefers to be a spectator to a good, old fashioned family feud. He just loves it when his ol' Daddy gets into it with one of his brothers and the tempers flare and the spit starts to spew and neither side in the argument will give an inch. Bret really gets off on being up close and witnessing one of those family disputes that he has no say in but each and every time he jumps in and prods and pushes to keep the combatants' vitriolic juices flowing. He's like the rich boxing fans who purchase the front row seats at title fights so they can get the best view of the punches landing and participate in the fray by having the blood spray on their high dollar clothes when the fighters clinch on the ropes. Bret and I find ourselves involved in disagreements on a recurring basis, even more so now that he is more educated in the world that I claim dominance over. That sphere of knowledge that was my bailiwick since my teen years, the one involving prodigious amounts of basically useless trivia from the worlds of sports, entertainment and mass media. Bret often challenges my memory about old movies and TV shows, books and sports events, local, statewide and national historical events. My sons Brian and Blake are also very sports-oriented and each of the three boys, all grown now, will impress me from time to time with the knowledge they have accumulated in their individual lives away from the protective wing of their father. And my adopted son Kirk is always staying on top of the breaking news in the areas of his special interests: professional football and basketball. All four of these kids, or at least years ago when they were my "kids," would constantly be impressed when they were much younger at what vast banks of knowledge their mother and father had collected in their pea brains as a result of growing up in the sixties, seventies and eighties. So I guess Peggy and I set the bar fairly high for our children and foster children to take a stab at reaching that level the two of us had claimed through our mutual love of reading, viewing television and motion pictures, and simply absorbing the world around us as we continued to mature. My wife and I still often reflect with amusement on something my uncle, Howard Giesler, said to Peggy when she and I had first began dating. My uncle was at my parents' house for Christmas dinner and gift giving many years ago when he asked what was written on the base of the Statue of Liberty. I had no idea, but my then-girlfriend Peggy Hall was able to tell my uncle the words inscribed. "Hey, she's pretty smart," Uncle remarked about Peggy, before adding his nonsequitur, "for a girl." Peggy and Brian have both learned, from years of experience, that it is better (or at least easier) to discontinue any argument started with me when they know I will never, ever give up. Even if I am wrong, like my grandmother was on occasion, rarely will I admit it. Kirk, on the other hand, doesn't know the meaning of the word quit. There are many other words he doesn't know the meaning of as well. Like pulchritude, anachronism, propitious and fealty. But that's fodder for another column. Fact is, Kirk will take a stand on practically any subject if he knows his stand opposes mine. He just loves to argue, especially with me. And since he is adopted and not from the same bloodline, I assume that is proof that the Guptons and Gieslers do not have the sole claim to having the hardest heads in the history of mankind. Outside of my family, I have come in contact with many people through my various employment positions who also believe a good argument simply boils down to healthy exercising of one's brain and vocal powers. The debate team I was never a part of in school. Too shy was this old boy to partake in a battle of wits when an audience was involved, or the verbal combatants were being graded on their speaking skills as well as their knowledge. But put me in a one-on-one situation with someone and I have the capability of being more than their equal in verbal sparring and, if the gloves are taken off, their worst nightmare! Get in a good down 'n dirty argument with the Gupster and it just could end up a battle to the death (or just seem like it when you just wish it would STOP!). Many of my coworkers have made the mistake of thinking they could sway my opinions to their way of thinking, simply by droning on and on for hours about why they believe the way they do. "That's why there is vanilla, chocolate and strawberry," my wife often says when remarking on the variety of opinions and tastes there are in the world. I rather enjoy listening to others' varying opinions, especially when those opinions that differ from my own can be supported with literature, research and background history. At least that beats "Just because!" for an answer when one is asked to provide a good reason they think the way they do. "Just because" is no answer at all. It is two simple words that equate to "I am too stupid and simple-minded to back up my stances with an educated response." Since my place of employment is not the proper forum to climb into the ring and partake in verbal combat with my fellow employees over important, sensitive subjects that are often bandied about in the control rooms of the refinery where I put my time in, I long ago made the decision to attempt to keep the bulk of my opinions to myself. To me that is the best option when dealing with people I am forced to spend enormous amounts of time with while in the midst of a career that could span as much as 30 years. But that is not to say that I don't often get peeved and more than a bit irritated when I have to sit idly by and listen to opinions being spread around that, according to my way of thinking, paint a few of my friends and coworkers as the narrow-minded, prejudiced, racist, backward-thinking morons they actually are. But tell us what you really think, Gup! People, such as myself, who often keep their feelings and opinions to themselves, tend to kind of erupt like a spewing volcano when they finally do open up and reveal what their thoughts are on a particular topic. That, unfortunately, is me. And I regret that I don't possess more self-control and the ability to remain calm when stating my side of an argument or dispute. Because there rarely is one single correct answer to any argument. There are simply differing opinions. So, in closing, I must say when it comes to my opinions on critical issues and stances in matters of great importance and how those opinions may or may not be aligned with yours, the majority of the time I must simply AGREE TO DISAGREE!